Home Waiting

Saturday, December 7, it was about 10:30 in the morning and I was getting caught up on a hot new TV show, Firefly.  OK, Firefly is not a new show.  It came out in 2002, and it only lasted for one season.  How could Fox cancel such a GREAT show after only one season.  Thank goodness for Netflix!  I digress I do believe....

Like I was saying I was watching Netflix when Jennifer comes walking in the room caring here cell phone. “Look at this!” Great, she has found some new online sale!  But as soon as I saw the screen I knew what she was looking at.  We have read messages sent to us from Bethany on the “Portal” on every computing / cellular device we own.  The look of the screen is unmistakable.  Jennifer checks the portal everyday for messages or updates.  Most of the time it is just general information sent to all the families.  Seeing the Portal pulled up on her phone did not excite me much.  You see our dossier was sent to Ethiopia in November, and we were under the impression that it would take two months for it to be authenticated by the Ethiopian Ministry of Foreign Affairs.  

Then I started to read the tiny message held out before me.  “This update is to let you know that your dossier has been authenticated at the Ministry of Foreign Affairs in Ethiopia and resisted with the Ministry of Women’s, Children’s and Youth Affairs in Addis Ababa.  The next stage of the process may be the most difficult one yet - which is waiting for your referral.”  

I went from watching a movie about space to going into orbit myself!  What should have taken months, God and the good people of Ethiopia did in days!!

This really didn’t hit home until the next day at church when someone asked where we were in the process.  I gave the customary answer, “We have all of our paperwork submitted and approved.  It could be 6 months or 3 years from now.”  That is when Jennifer looked at me and said, “And it could be tomorrow too.”

Wow!  Any day now my phone could buzz with the receipt of an email telling me there is a referral waiting for us.  My children are in the world.  If only I could get to them!  If only I could bring them home today!

Home.  What a wonderful word.  What a wonderful feeling.  Today my father asked me to go to Dalton and help him clean out the rental property that my parents are now selling.  The thing is, that rental property was the home I grew up in.  I had my first pet there.  I had my first booboos there.  I was the hero in more make-believe battles from that front porch than the number of real battles that have ever been fought.  It was the place where I asked Jesus to come into my heart.  It was the driveway where my first car was parked.  After college that house became the first home I ever paid for as I rented it from my parents.  It was the home where I carried my new bride over the threshold.  

Today, I was amazed at how the place had changed.  The yard was not as big as I remembered as a child.  Trees that I planted as a child have grown to the sky, and long since fallen.  The place of my childhood is gone.  The home of the newlyweds is gone.  Sold.  But the love remains.  The memories remain.  I know what home is because of that house.

My adopted children, will they have those feelings about our home?  Will they love this house as I loved that one?  Oh, if I could just get them home!!

Hello Children! Momma and Daddy love you, where ever you are!

Hello Children,

I wanted to write you this letter to let you know how much daddy and momma already love you.  I know we have not met yet, but you burn in my heart like nothing I have ever experienced.  Momma and I hope for you, pray for you, and love you daily.  The best way I know to tell you of my love is to write you a letter to tell you about your family.

First, I want to tell you about your church family.  You see momma and daddy were adopted too.  No, not exactly like you.  But there is this whole group of people who love us, call us brother, sister yet we do not live with them or share biological blood lines.  They taught us about adoption.  They love us for who we are.  They support us and pray for us.  Tonight at church the pastor allowed me to come up on stage and tell the congregation about what momma and daddy are doing to get to you.  He then prayed for you.  I hope tonight you did not feel alone.  Because you are not alone! Tonight you had a whole group of people agreeing in prayer for your safety and health.  Most importantly the God who created this world looked down on you tonight and smiled, because He heard our prayers.

I can’t wait for you to met all these people who are already praying for you.  I can’t wait for you to meet our spiritual family who we are so very close with.  I can’t wait until your first hug from Felicia.  She will love you like momma and daddy do.  I can’t wait for the first time Joe teaches you something new.  I’m betting it will be about how to show kindness.  I can’t wait for Stephen Thomas to lay his hands on you and pray over you.  I can’t wait for Daniel to teach you to sing, and frustrate you because you can do it as well as him or do it at the kitchen table like he does.  I can’t wait for Angela to ask you to snuggle.  Or Kayla to teach you the social economics of the United States.  Or for you to experience the love of so many people who have loved on momma and daddy!

I can’t wait for your to met the rest of the family.  Meme to spoil you.  Bebe to tease you. Uncle Shawn to say, “What’s up, buddy.”  Aunt Maggie to try to take you home with her. Grammy to show you her very special brand of love.  Poppy to whistle at you. Aunt GiGi to explain why she is Aunt GiGi, and the kindness of Uncle Sam.  Oh and your cousins.  Both in Texas and Georgia.  The fun you will have!

I can’t wait to get you home to Ooltewah.  Where Kimberlee and Brody will teach you balloony ball in the den.  Where we can hold you, kiss you, and keep you safe.  A place where you will always be loved for who you are.  A place where your biggest worry will be how successful can you become.  

Most importantly, I can’t wait to introduce you to my Abba Father.  The God who adopted me when I did not feel I was worth being apart of a family.  The sweet Savior who gave me hope when I was lost.  I pray you learn to love Him as much as I do.  I know He loves you!

So tonight, where ever you are, what ever you are doing, Momma and Daddy love you very much. My heart breaks not to be able to hold you and tell you so today.  But I promise, every day of your lives, you are loved greatly!!

Love 

Daddy

To all other readers:  I had to make this part of our blog.  To show the newest addition one day that before they were here, they were already a part of our lives.  Please join us in praying for our children who are a world a way.  

Where We Are

Hello Everyone!

Since we created the blog, I have had many people ask us where we are in the process.  Jennifer has also asked several times when we were going to update the blog.  Well, this should do both!

I have found the adoption process to be a “hurry up and wait” game.  This of course has been explained to us by everyone in the world; from the good people at Bethany who told us this process was long and full of unexpected twist, to every person we have ever met who ever knew anyone who had adopted and felt obligated to tell us how long the process was for their friend/family member/ person they once heard a story about.  However, all of the stories in the world do not prepare you.  You think this is a God thing so the waters will part, the sky will open and wham your done!!  Not so much!!

The process is long, and long for many good reasons.  If you have never looked into adoption, here is a brief glimpse into the process.  First you choose where you want to adopted from.  For us, we knew it was Africa, but we didn’t know where in Africa.  All we knew is that we were children of the 80’s, and the pictures of Africa we had in our heads were of “WE ARE THE WORLD” and all of the little Ethiopian children in that music video.  So naturally we said, “Anywhere but Ethiopia!”  But God….  Everywhere we turned, God laid Ethiopia and the people of Ethiopia on our hearts and the hearts of our friends.   We have learned to love a country we have not been to and to love a people we have not met!

With the “where” addressed, we contacted Bethany Christian Services.  The process sounded simple, even though they stressed the length of the process.  First you have a home study done.  A little scary to think your 5 year old will be discussing your parenting skills with a person who will be deciding your fate as an adoptive parent.  This is not just a person taking a couple of pictures of your house and talking to your children.  It is a dissertation on your life.  “What was life like growing up?”  “How often do you talk to your parents?”  “Your in-laws?”  “Do people like you?”  “Do you like yourself?” “Do you like people liking you?”  Then just for fun, everyone in the world gets to read it and approve or decline you.  

Then you have good ol’ Uncle Sam!  No, not Uncle Sam, Aunt GiGi’s husband.  The US Government.  Once the home study is approved you must ask Uncle Sam if you may bring a child back into the country.  You write them a check, get your fingerprints taken, and wait to see if you are on some watch list somewhere.        

Once that is done you can complete your dossier.  This is the file that will be sent to a country that outlines everything there is to know about you.  It has letters from friends saying you are good people.  Letters from your boss that says you’re a good employee.  Letters from a doctor saying you are in good health.  Then there are pictures of your house and family.  This is all accompanied by a host of other documents.   Not including the home study, there were some 26 documents.  All needing to be notarized, county sealed, and state sealed.  

Once this is all done, the file is sent back to the adoption agency for final approval, translation and sent to Ethiopia.  Once there and approved, you hurry up and wait for a child to be referred to you. The referral process can be 6 months to 3 years.   Then a whole other process for bringing the child/children home begins.  But that is a different blog.

So where are we?  There was a long delay by the US government. It was a miscommunication that cost us about a month.  With that hurdle cleared we have gotten all of our notaries, county seals, and everything has been sent to the state for the state seals. We expect to have our documents back on Monday the 15th from the State of Tennessee.   We hope to meet with Bethany early in the week to finalize our Dossier.  Then…. We hurry up and wait!! 

How It Happened

In December of 2010 I graduated with my Masters Degree in Theological Studies. While I was working on my masters I would go to the local used book store and look for any book that I could use as a "Scholarly Source." This is any book that basically had footnotes in it.  As I browsed the Christian book section, I would open a book and look for footnotes.  Content didn’t matter.  Just as long as it was in the Christian book section AND it had those magical footnotes, it made it into the Finch library.  One such book was entitled Red Letters.

One day my wife Jennifer had finished her latest book and walked into the little library looking for something new.  She stumbled on to the book Red Letters.  Like me when I picked it up, she assumed it was about the words of Jesus.  Well, in a way it was.  It was not about the words Jesus spoke in the New Testament, but about the words Jesus would speak to our hearts.

The book Red Letters is actually a book about the AIDS epidemic in Africa.  It is very heavy.  Half way through the book Jennifer came to me and said she could not finish the book.  She told me what it was about.  To which I said, OK.  Still we would leave for our daughters swim practice and I would grab the IPad, and Jennifer would pick up Red Letters.

Almost at the end of the book Jennifer was very moved by what she had  read.  But why could she not put the book down?  Why had she read this heart breaking book?  She was only one woman in Chattanooga, TN.  What could she do about AIDS in Africa? So she bowed her head and asked God these questions.  Then as God will do, He answered.  “Jennifer, I have given you a heart to love.  You can love one child.”

The next chapter was about adopting from Africa.  Jennifer prayed again, “God, if we are to do this, I can’t do it over the phone.  There will have to be an agency near Chattanooga that I can go talk to.”  The next chapter in the book recommended a couple of adoption agencies.  You guessed it.  One of them has an office here in Chattanooga.    

 I remember when Jennifer approached me about adopting from Africa.  We were standing in the living room, and as casually as you suggest you need milk from the story, Jennifer said, “Chris, I need to talk to you about something.  I want you to pray about adopting from Africa.” 

Her words were like warm soup on a cold day.  I felt a warmth sweep over me, smiled, and said, “OK!”  Off we went on this journey to seek after God.  God so loved us that He gave his only Son so that we too can be adopted into His family. 

This blog will be our record of our journey to put actions to the Red Letter spoken to our hearts.